Crying lots

I cried alot today, it was not the cry of relief or the cry of thanking myself, it was a cry of what am i going to do, am i going to sit in turmoil or get this done through forgiveness and self honesty in every moment. i`m still not sure exactly if i was crying because i felt sorry for myself,,, i did feel sorry for myself, i cried to because of the guilt i feel of doing nothing when i should have stood up in those moments and said what needed to be said. I cried because of the distance i have put between myself and those that i enjoy. It has not solved the ultimate problem, but i experience myself as softer and more willing to accept. The crying has assisted me in not being so hard on myself and not so judgemental, i am more aware of myself because i am accepting more of myself.

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Published in: on January 23, 2008 at 2:26 pm  Leave a Comment  

My Process: Self-Forgiveness

Hi, this is a page with my process on it. I am in a strange time of my life at the moment and stepping through it gradually in every moment,step by step piece by piece untill i am in full realization of myself and full expression of myself. I have found that the greatest challenge i have been faced with is wants and desires, we are taught to want and desire so much in this world, from when we are small to when we are grown, but we are never taught to want nothing, to desire nothing, to be content with what is here and to enjoy yourself as you move as life in every moment.  To be gratefull for yourself and your beingness, completeley content with the existence of yourself in every moment is the greatest gift you can give yourself and it is the gift of life, your new life, a life that you have birthed yourself into because it was chosen by you to honour yourself and to trust yourself as yourself in every moment because that is what is best for all as life and there is no grater act of love or kindness or generosity you can offer yourself and all as equal and one because that is the only thing you are really able to give yourself because you are everything. So this is my process in understanding that to be in wanting means to be in seperation and to be in a state of greed and dishonesty and distrust in yourself because it means that you are looking for something outside yourself to satisfy something that doesnt need to be satisfied and you will end up growing fat from it. I strongly advise all who read this to read this, understand this and pass it through to another.

Published in: on January 21, 2008 at 8:29 pm  Leave a Comment